Saturday, October 5, 2013

Bitter pill

I am in a midst of minuting a family conference that took place last month in September.  It's a very tiring piece of 90 plus minutes recording.

It is so emotionally draining and mentally taxing, because I have to repeatedly listen to each and single word that was exchanged.  Those logical point of view from the medical aspects, and in contrast, the family griefs of losing their loved one; this debate within me gets me upset and unusually down:- I struggled between the roles of a medical professional versus being a daughter. 

During the first few months of my new job, I spent some time familiarising medical reports of the patients, I have to admit that each medical history scares me... patients of all ages, medical conditions of all kind, huge financial medical bills, long term treatment versus incurable diseases, all are true and sad stories...

Last month, a patient chosen to ended his life, he was a young and successful entrepreneur.  I was not shocked when I heard the news, somehow I could understand why he did that, I could relate to how he felt... but at the same time I wonder if he had made a right decision... did he regret the very instant he took the plunge?

Again I question if he ever consider the feelings of his parents?  But who am I to judge?  Life is very brittle in nature... I know how it feels to be sick for a long period of time, the vulnerability of life, the loneliness in face of illness, honestly there are also many times that I just thought of giving up, but I still have many things in life that I am thankful of... Or I could be just a pure coward...

No one cheats Life. All is fair in the face of Death.

No comments:

Post a Comment