Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Crossroads

Felt breathless...

The minute i stepped into the office, somehow oxygen seems to be sapped out from the air. Is it me, or the people around me? Losing momentum is not something i encounter often, in fact rarely... Strong urge to move, and yet i need to curb myself, force myself to stop and evaluate my options.

New environment would do me good, new challenges, new things to learn. No doubts i will also be crossing path with the same kind, or even more "powerful" colleagues than now. Come what may, I am willing to accept them.

Remaining status quo doesn't guarantee any prospects, job satisfaction is at all times low, the minute I'm off for the day, i could immediately feel the rush of euphoria (no exaggeration at all). I have to admit this used to be my comfort battle zone. Achieving more is not impossible, but i just couldn't find the motivation to do so. I have adopted the "wait-and-see" attitude for so long, diligence and efforts doesn't equate to rewards. Getting recognition from the bosses does feed the egoistic side of me, but yet the monetary value never appreciates along with it. Fellow collegues are of great disappointment as well, plenty of backstabbers and red-eyed monsters.

My lear told me "you are wasting your youth and intelligence away". What worries me is that she might be the only one who thinks that i still have the market value?

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